Warning: Lack of self-care does more harm than you think! 

Looking at my calendar, I noticed that September was about to finish... which means, starting October 1st, we only have 93 days until the new year! Oh boy, how time flies! That got me thinking, as the end of the year approaches, I have noticed that many people face one very similar obstacle, which can be dreadful. Which obstacle is that you may ask? Well, before I answer that, begin to visualize a person struggling because their dread is very real.

Okay, so I want you to think of someone. This person can be someone you know or it could even be yourself. Think of someone who works non-stop, is constantly on the go go go with little to no breaks. This person prides themselves on the idea that they are very busy but deep down feel like they haven’t accomplished much. By the end of the week or even by the end of the day they’re hella exhausted! They also have little motivation to do things for themselves, they constantly talk about how tired they feel, they seem to have brain fog, and they are easily irritable!  

So, what I am asking you is, do you know someone who is experiencing what we call “BURNOUT?” Burnout is when there is a build-up of stress that causes a person to feel extremely, physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausted...and I mean EXHAUSTED! 

Okay, so keeping that person in mind, what do you notice about this person’s work-life balance? Better question, what’s missing in their work-life balance? 

The Secret Sauce 

I’ll give you a clue. People often associate this with warm baths, drinking a glass of wine (or two), and endless spa days... but if you still haven’t guessed it, they are missing a WELL ROUNDED SELF-CARE ROUTINE! You may be thinking, “That’s it? That’s the secret to fixing burnouts?” Why, yes, it is! Unfortunately, not many people partake in self-care, that’s why you were able to think of someone so quickly. And I would imagine that the person you are thinking of doesn’t really do activities that take care of their well-being, such as exercising or sleeping 8 hours a night. Right? Because they are “too busy” with other things. 

I know many people that believe being burned out is a good thing. Well to be fair, they don’t know they are burning out, they believe they are just extremely busy. And that “busyness” gives them a sense of importance and purpose. And to a certain degree, it does. HOWEVER, there is a difference between being busy versus being productive. Anyone can fill up their schedule (with driving, TV, scrolling on TikTok, etc) and then suddenly become busy, but not everyone is productive whilst they are busy. And in order for you to be productive, you must be recharged so that you can handle your work effectively. And in order for you to be recharged, you must integrate a self-care routine to create and integrate balance into your life. 

Self-care… and before you give me a list of all the fabulous face masks, skincare products, essential oils, and bath bombs mainstream media sells to us (which I would love to see btw CUZ YA GURL likes experimenting with products) I want to get down to the nitty gritty on what self-care is. Because it is important to know that there is so much more to self-care, and the best part is that it doesn't put a dent in your wallet. 

So what exactly is self-care? 

Well, self-care is when you consciously decide to pause every day and check-in with yourself to make sure you are okay. I honestly didn’t mean to make that rhyme but let’s go with it. Self-care is about nurturing your inner and outer needs by creating daily practices, rituals, and activities that will improve your well-being. These practices do not have to take much of your time either.

Though self-care does look different for everyone, self-care should cover these four areas: Physical self-care, spiritual self-care, mental self-care, and social self-care. If you are looking to improve or start a self-care routine or know of someone who can benefit from this then keep on reading. 

Four Areas of Self-Care

Let’s start with a check-in to see how you are currently covering these four areas. After each section, you will get the opportunity to reflect on your routine. I encourage you to journal this!

Physical Self-Care 

Physical self-care refers to how you are physically taking care of your needs. 

1. Do you currently have a morning routine? If yes, what specifically is working for you? And what is not? If not, how would you like to ideally start your morning? 
2. Do you currently have a bedtime routine? If yes, what specifically is working for you? And what is not? If not, how would you ideally like your rest time to be? 
3. How many hours a night do you sleep? Are you okay with those numbers?
4. How often do you keep up with your hygiene? 
5. How often, if any, are you exercising? 
6. How often are you going for walks? 
7. How often are you incorporating healthy foods into your meals? 
8. Do you drink enough water?
9. Are you getting enough sunlight?

If you are struggling with this area, answer this: What is a specific action you can take right now to help you improve these areas? How can you take that action and make it into a daily habit?  

Spiritual Self-Care

Spiritual self-care refers to any practices/rituals we participate in that builds a deeper connection with our purpose and sense of self (e.g. mediation, prayer, yoga, journaling, walking through a luscious green forest) 

1. What current practices do you participate in that helps you ground yourself? 
2. How are you connecting with nature (and how often)? 
3. What do you do to ease or remove negative energy around you? 

If you are struggling with this area, answer this: What is a specific action you can take right now to help you improve these areas? How can you take that action and make it into a daily habit? 

Mental Self-Care

Mental self-care refers to practices you do to help you stay mentally strong.

1. What practices do you do to reduce your stress?
2. What books are you reading?
3. Which podcast are you hearing?
4. How are you disconnecting from technology (including social media)?
5. How’s your workspace? Homespace? Clutter-free or cluttered? 

If you are struggling with this area, answer this: What is a specific action you can take right now to help you improve these areas? How can you take that action and make it into a daily habit? 

Social Self-Care

Yes, social self-care is important too! Because it is important to maintain healthy relationships with the people we care about. 

1. How often do you have phone or face-to-face conversations with your close friends and/or relatives? (Does not include texting) 
2. If you have a significant other, how often do you go on date nights? 
3. If you have companions(pets), how often do you spend time with them?

If you are struggling with this area, answer this: What is a specific action you can take right now to help you improve these areas? How can you take that action and make it into a daily habit? 

Recap

Working nonstop without taking care of yourself may help you achieve your goal faster, but it comes at a great price. Remember, life is about balance, not just work. If you choose to start implementing a self-care routine make sure to schedule them at times that are NON- NEGOTIABLE (meaning under no circumstance will you change or alter this time. There is no negotiating with this commitment. You are sticking to it the same way you stick to showering and getting ready). The key is to train yourself to make self-care part of your lifestyle, which will ultimately train you to make YOURSELF a priority. Also, start slow! I made a list for you peeps so you don’t have to look any further. Start with one from the four areas of self-care and work your way up! And remember, BREATHE, make sure you get sunlight and drink enough water. You got this. 

Now, I challenge you to practice self-care every day, and after practicing it daily, come back to me and let me know how you feel. And remember to ask yourself, how am I pausing each day to take care of my physical, spiritual, mental, and social well-being? 

- Edna Mendez, M.A.  Life Coach & Mentor.  

 

 Edna Méndez is a life coach and mentor who has defied family expectations, ended toxic relationships, and has challenged societal norms. Equipped with a Masters degree and have gone through a life coaching program herself, Edna certainly knows a thing or two about achieving anything she puts her mind too. Edna encourages many of her clients to do the same as she helps them all fall back in love with themselves.